Our parsha opens with a general call to sanctity, then defining how a one can live with true holiness, whether in spiritual matters or in financial matters and finally in interpersonal relationships.
One of the pesukim that deal with courts & judges states, בצדק תשפט עמיתך, with righteousness shall you judge your fellow, which, at face value, is referring to the judge that he should judge every case fairly. Rashi says it also refers to all people; that when you see someone doing something that is questionable, give him the benefit of the doubt & judge him favorably.
This Mitzva says the מהרי"ל דיסקין, is not only for the benefit of our friend, it also can be a great benefit to us as well. Chazal praise the character trait of one who embarrasses easily, for one who is brazen & doesn't embarrass easily will end up sinning whereas one who does embarrass easily will not sin so quickly.
This concept can explain why people who are in a group, find it easier to do something they wouldn’t do otherwise. If one of the people in the group sins, then his friend who sees him doing it won't be as embarrassed to do it himself. The more people that sin in that group lower the embarrassment level until the last guy, who might never have dreamed of doing this, won't be embarrassed at all. The actions of the group have cooled off the sin making it not seem bad; they took the embarrassment factor out too.
So how does one prevent himself from being able to sin easily? דן את חברך לכף זכות, judge your friend favorably, for, if you judge him favorably & find an excuse for him that he's not sinning, then the embarrassment factor will never diminish in you. In your view, no one is sinning, then you too will not come to sin easily.
Additionally, we really never know why a person is doing something or what their situation is for us to pass judgment.
There was a woman who had to travel overseas & once she got to the airport & took care of everything she had to, she saw that there was plenty of time until the plane would take off. Since she was very hungry, she went to the shop, bought a box of cookies, put them in her bag & went to the waiting area so she could eat as she waited for boarding.
She put her stuff on the table, went to take care of something for a minute, then came back, opened the package of cookies & started eating. To her astonishment, a man who was sitting on the bench opposite her also took a cookie without saying a word. She didn't react to his brazenness & took another cookie. To her surprise, he did too; every time she took one he did too. She was seething inside but was too embarrassed to say anything. When they got to the last cookie, the man took it, broke it in half, ate one half & gave her the other. She was confounded by the audacity of this person, but just got up & walked away.
When she got on the plane, she opened her bag before putting it in the overhead compartment, & saw her box of cookies sitting right there on top. Then it dawned on her what had happened. That box of cookies that she had been eating really belonged to the man across from her; she was the one with the audacity to eat without asking; she was the guilty party, not him.
Sometimes it's just a misplaced box of cookies or any number of things that we might not realize. Not only did we suspect unjustly, but the tables could turn completely & make us the guilty ones. We have to learn from this to think positively of others; don’t judge anyone harshly. One, because you never really know the backstory and two, so that our embarrassment to sin will not be lessened by the assumption that others are sinning. Let’s all learn to judge others the way we'd want to be judged...favorably!
No comments:
Post a Comment