After Yosef and the brothers came back from burying their father, the brothers were fearful that now Yosef would get back at them for all that they did to him. Therefore, they said to him that their father had requested that they should ask him for forgiveness & that he should forgive them.
Yosef wept as he assured them that since he bore no grudge, they have nothing to fear. The end of that posuk states וידבר על לבם ,and he spoke to their heart.
Rashi explains that Yosef elaborated on the reasons that they had nothing to fear. He explained: “Before you came down here, the Egyptians would make fun of me saying that I'm a slave but now that you arrived here, they realize that I really was a free man. If I kill you now, the people will say that he saw a group of young men, latched on to them to say he's a brother & then he kills them.” The Egyptians would then conclude, Is there such a thing where a brother kills a brother; Yosef must have been lying.
Says רב זילברשטיין we that learn from this conversation that when someone wants to dispel bad feelings someone has towards him, he shouldn't just brush him off with lame excuses. He should instead get to the heart of the matter & explain why those feelings aren't founded. This is what the Torah tells us when Yaakov explains to Yosef why he buried Rochel on the road rather than in the city.
Rashi explains that he elaborated & told him, I didn't even bring her to בית לחם which I know has caused you to be upset at me in your heart. You should know, though, that I did it only because 'ה told me to. הגר"ח שמואלביץ asks, “why did Yaakov have to go into detail with Yosef? Why not simply say 'ה told me where to bury her? הגר"ח שמואלביץ answers that had Yaakov just said that, Yosef wouldn't have been satisfied & would always be thinking that maybe there was something more he could have done. Therefore, Yaakov went through the entire explanation with him including all the different angles as well as what he could have done in order to explain to him that even with all the questions you might have, Rochel’s burial followed 'ה's command. Therefore, he couldn't have any other thoughts on the matter.
Why does it matter if someone has lingering thoughts as long as you know that you did the right thing?
When the brothers asked Yosef for forgiveness, they said ועתה שא נא לפשע עבדי אלקי אביך ,so now, please forgive the spiteful deed of the servants of your father’s G-d. Rashi says they were reminding Yosef that although your father is dead, his G-d is still alive
The sefer עטרת צבי explains by quoting the gemara that says, at the time when a person is in pain, the Shechina says קלני מראשי קלני מזרועי , my head is heavy & my arms are heavy. I created this person & now he's being punished; the Shechina is pained by the suffering of people.
Yosef's brothers believed that, while Yaakov was alive, Yosef did not wish to cause him pain so he didn't harm them. Therefore they said to him, "although your father is dead, his G-d is still alive; if you didn't want to cause pain to your father surely you wouldn't want to cause pain to 'ה who shares in everyone’s pain.
The אוצרות התורה relates a story that was told to the חיד"א by the אור החיים who said that in רב חיים בן עטר זצ"ל's town, one of the prominent members of the community degraded a חכם. The rav called the חכם to appease him and convince him to make peace. As he's talking, the חכם interrupts and asks, “why are you are you bothering yourself with this? The second he insulted me, I immediately forgave him because the 'זוהר הק says that the sins of the Jewish people cause 'ה anguish. Had I not forgiven him right away, the sin would take effect causing pain to 'ה. Therefore I forgave him before the sin could even take effect.
Based on this, the חיד"א says that's why it says כל המעביר על מדותיו מעבירים ממנו כל פשעיו anyone who overcomes his character traits & allows things to slide is forgiven for all his sins. Since he lets things slide, forgiving people who harm him, he insures that 'ה not be pained; מידה כנגד מידה , all his sins are removed so as not to pain 'ה
That's why it’s important not to leave any lingering doubt when you appease someone for we don't want people to be pained, thinking bad of other people thereby causing 'ה to be pained too. This teaches us to admit when we’re wrong & to explain the situation so that there is no bad blood which would cause anyone any pain. Then, מידה כנגד מידה, we too won't have any pain!
Friday, December 28, 2012
Friday, December 21, 2012
Vayigash
After the Torah tells us about Yaakov & all the families coming down to Mitzraim, the Posuk says וישב ישראל בארץ מצרים בארץ גשן , thus Israel settled in the land of Egypt, in the land of Goshen.
If you look at the wording of the posuk it seems superfluous. Asks רב משה פיינשטיין זצוק"ל why does it have to say בארץ מצרים? We already know from the previous pesukim that Goshen is in Mitzraim?
Earlier in the Parsha, prior to Yaakov agreeing to come down to Mitzraim, he sent Yehuda in advance to prepare the way. The Midrash debates why he sent him down. One rabbi says to set up a yeshiva for them to learn in while one says to set up a home for them to live in.
The עלינו לשבח asks, it's understandable why he would have to send him down to set up a yeshiva for there were none in Mitzraim. If the Jewish people were to live there, it was imperative that there be a yeshiva set up for them.
However, if the reason he sent him was just to set up a house, what was the emergency? Why couldn't they just move into Yosef's palace until their own place would be ready?
There was an old Jew who recited a story from his youth. It was during the time of World War I and many kids his age were leaving the Yeshiva to go to work. He also wanted to go with them but his father didn't want him to.
At that time, the חפץ חיים was living in their town & they agreed to go to him to ask what to do. Both presented their side of the story. The father said he didn't want him to go work because of the negative influences on the street & he didn't want him to get messed up. The son, for his part, said that his father himself goes to work on the street yet he hasn’t been negatively influenced so he wouldn't get messed up either.
The חפץ חיים turned to the young child, stated that we find one time in Tanach that it mentions a cruel bird called the בת יענה & inquired: do you know why we say that it’s cruel? He responded that this bird has a very strong stomach which is able to digest even glass. The mother bird believes that her kids can eat glass, too, so she feeds them glass without realizing that they are too young & tender to be able to handle it. The glass rips up their throats & they die.
So, too, said the חפץ חיים your father, who is older & more seasoned, can handle the outside world without becoming influenced but you, who are so young & impressionable, can be influenced negatively, so stay in yeshiva.
Similarly, answers the sefer באר יוסף , perhaps that’s the reason Yaakov didn't want to go live in Yosef's palace, even temporarily. Since Yosef was the ruler of Mitzraim, with dignitaries & diplomats regularly visiting, he was forced to have his palace befitting a ruler of Egypt with Egyptian decor while he and his family dressed in Egyptian garb. Yaakov didn't want the Egyptian ways, whether in dress, language or mannerisms to rub off on his family. Therefore, he had Yehuda go down in advance to prepare a Jewish home for his family.
This, too, is how רב משה explains the reason for the Torah stressing בארץ מצרים בארץ גשן to teach us that, even though we had to be exiled in Egypt, we still had to make sure that we wouldn't mingle with them. We stayed separate in Goshen in order not to learn from the ways of the Egyptians. The extra words of בארץ מצרים teaches us the importance of living in a good environment surrounded by other Jews, especially when we’re bringing up our children!
If you look at the wording of the posuk it seems superfluous. Asks רב משה פיינשטיין זצוק"ל why does it have to say בארץ מצרים? We already know from the previous pesukim that Goshen is in Mitzraim?
Earlier in the Parsha, prior to Yaakov agreeing to come down to Mitzraim, he sent Yehuda in advance to prepare the way. The Midrash debates why he sent him down. One rabbi says to set up a yeshiva for them to learn in while one says to set up a home for them to live in.
The עלינו לשבח asks, it's understandable why he would have to send him down to set up a yeshiva for there were none in Mitzraim. If the Jewish people were to live there, it was imperative that there be a yeshiva set up for them.
However, if the reason he sent him was just to set up a house, what was the emergency? Why couldn't they just move into Yosef's palace until their own place would be ready?
There was an old Jew who recited a story from his youth. It was during the time of World War I and many kids his age were leaving the Yeshiva to go to work. He also wanted to go with them but his father didn't want him to.
At that time, the חפץ חיים was living in their town & they agreed to go to him to ask what to do. Both presented their side of the story. The father said he didn't want him to go work because of the negative influences on the street & he didn't want him to get messed up. The son, for his part, said that his father himself goes to work on the street yet he hasn’t been negatively influenced so he wouldn't get messed up either.
The חפץ חיים turned to the young child, stated that we find one time in Tanach that it mentions a cruel bird called the בת יענה & inquired: do you know why we say that it’s cruel? He responded that this bird has a very strong stomach which is able to digest even glass. The mother bird believes that her kids can eat glass, too, so she feeds them glass without realizing that they are too young & tender to be able to handle it. The glass rips up their throats & they die.
So, too, said the חפץ חיים your father, who is older & more seasoned, can handle the outside world without becoming influenced but you, who are so young & impressionable, can be influenced negatively, so stay in yeshiva.
Similarly, answers the sefer באר יוסף , perhaps that’s the reason Yaakov didn't want to go live in Yosef's palace, even temporarily. Since Yosef was the ruler of Mitzraim, with dignitaries & diplomats regularly visiting, he was forced to have his palace befitting a ruler of Egypt with Egyptian decor while he and his family dressed in Egyptian garb. Yaakov didn't want the Egyptian ways, whether in dress, language or mannerisms to rub off on his family. Therefore, he had Yehuda go down in advance to prepare a Jewish home for his family.
This, too, is how רב משה explains the reason for the Torah stressing בארץ מצרים בארץ גשן to teach us that, even though we had to be exiled in Egypt, we still had to make sure that we wouldn't mingle with them. We stayed separate in Goshen in order not to learn from the ways of the Egyptians. The extra words of בארץ מצרים teaches us the importance of living in a good environment surrounded by other Jews, especially when we’re bringing up our children!
Friday, December 14, 2012
Mikeitz
The Midrash finds the words of Yaakov when he says to the brothers למה הרעותם לי, why did you treat me badly, totally out of character. The Midrash says that this is the only time Yaakov said something that wasn't proper, for he implied that what 'ה was doing was by chance. 'ה said that I am working to make his son the king in Egypt & he says למה הרעותם לי ?
It appeared that the sale of Yosef was a terrible tragedy, disastrous for Yaakov when, in reality, it was the opposite. Because of the sale, Yosef becomes second to the king giving him the ability to support Yaakov & all the families in the time of hunger.
However, asks the אוצרות התורה how could Yaakov be faulted for his question? He had lost his favorite son, the one whom he had taught all that he had learned from Shem & Ever. This was the son who was the greatest of the brothers in wisdom whose safety was compromised by Yaakov’s request that he go check on his brothers. Yaakov thought that Yosef had been mauled by animals & blamed himself because he had sent him to the brothers. Therefore, how could there be any fault found in Yaakov for saying למה הרעותם לי ?
Writes ר' אברהם גרודזינסקי, a human being is limited by place and time. He doesn't know what's good or bad for he only knows what's going on around him, not what's happening in other places. Also, a person can only see what's happening now since doesn't know the future. Chazal prove this theory from Yaakov; not only couldn't Yaakov see the future that Yosef would become king, he cried bitter tears for nine years while Yosef had already become King of Egypt. Just a few hours journey could have transformed Yaakov’s mourning into joy. The key is to have absolute trust in 'ה that whatever He's doing is for the best which is exemplified by the following story.
The author of המגיד מדבר tells us a story that was told to him directly from the person involved. When the "white" anti Bolsheviks came to power after WWI, the Jews enjoyed a few years of peace & some even became wealthy. Every day this person was in his office by 8 o'clock. One morning as he made his way to the office, he heard someone calling out.
A man was standing on the steps to a small shul calling out for a tenth man to complete a minyan. Since he was early, he went in to complete the minyan. However once he was inside, he saw that there were only four other people. He went back out and said, “what's going on? I'm not the tenth only the fifth; it'll take you all day to get ten people.” He answered that many Jews pass this way so it won't be long. He sat down & said tehillim ten minutes went by & only one more person came in. He got up to leave but the gentleman pleaded with him to wait since he had yahrtzeit for his father and needed a minyan.
This person couldn’t stay since he had to be in the office by eight & it was already eight. The man got angry at him & said, “I am not letting you leave; I have yahrtzeit & need to say kaddish. As soon as I get a minyan & we daven, you can leave.”
Not wanting to antagonize this individual, he unwillingly went back to say tehillim but still, only two more people arrived. Realizing that his morning was shot anyway, he remained until finally a minyan congregated. He thought the man would just say a mishna & then kaddish so he was surprised when he started from the beginning of davening. Wanting to leave he kept looking to the door hoping someone else would walk so he could go, but no one did. After the conclusion of the davening, the man brought out cake & schnapps. Only after that and with profuse thanks was he able to leave.
Finally he was making his way to the office when a man came running frantically screaming to get away. This man said that the communists came, overtook the city, killed out all the Jews & are now raiding the spoils. He turned, ran for his life & was able, after a few days, to escape Russia.
Imagine what would have happened had he left that minyan early.
On Chanuka, we say הפכת מספדי למחול לי פתחת שקי ותאזרני שמחה , you have changed my lament into dancing; you undid my sackcloth & girded me with gladness. The שפת אמת says that the days of Chanuka are days of great inspiration for the Jewish people. We were at a tremendous low when 'ה helped & we were taken out of slavery to freedom, out of bondage to redemption, teaching us that as great as the problems are, that's how great the redemption will be. Never give up & trust that 'ה knows what He's doing which will only be for our benefit.
Maybe this is the fault found in Yaakov’s question. While things looked so bleak & the pain was too much to bear, surely he knew that whatever 'ה did was for his benefit. Having those words come out of his mouth, however, insinuating that there was no plan, that things were just happening, was something that never should have been spoken. Teaching us that no matter what happens & what things look like, 'ה always has a plan!
It appeared that the sale of Yosef was a terrible tragedy, disastrous for Yaakov when, in reality, it was the opposite. Because of the sale, Yosef becomes second to the king giving him the ability to support Yaakov & all the families in the time of hunger.
However, asks the אוצרות התורה how could Yaakov be faulted for his question? He had lost his favorite son, the one whom he had taught all that he had learned from Shem & Ever. This was the son who was the greatest of the brothers in wisdom whose safety was compromised by Yaakov’s request that he go check on his brothers. Yaakov thought that Yosef had been mauled by animals & blamed himself because he had sent him to the brothers. Therefore, how could there be any fault found in Yaakov for saying למה הרעותם לי ?
Writes ר' אברהם גרודזינסקי, a human being is limited by place and time. He doesn't know what's good or bad for he only knows what's going on around him, not what's happening in other places. Also, a person can only see what's happening now since doesn't know the future. Chazal prove this theory from Yaakov; not only couldn't Yaakov see the future that Yosef would become king, he cried bitter tears for nine years while Yosef had already become King of Egypt. Just a few hours journey could have transformed Yaakov’s mourning into joy. The key is to have absolute trust in 'ה that whatever He's doing is for the best which is exemplified by the following story.
The author of המגיד מדבר tells us a story that was told to him directly from the person involved. When the "white" anti Bolsheviks came to power after WWI, the Jews enjoyed a few years of peace & some even became wealthy. Every day this person was in his office by 8 o'clock. One morning as he made his way to the office, he heard someone calling out.
A man was standing on the steps to a small shul calling out for a tenth man to complete a minyan. Since he was early, he went in to complete the minyan. However once he was inside, he saw that there were only four other people. He went back out and said, “what's going on? I'm not the tenth only the fifth; it'll take you all day to get ten people.” He answered that many Jews pass this way so it won't be long. He sat down & said tehillim ten minutes went by & only one more person came in. He got up to leave but the gentleman pleaded with him to wait since he had yahrtzeit for his father and needed a minyan.
This person couldn’t stay since he had to be in the office by eight & it was already eight. The man got angry at him & said, “I am not letting you leave; I have yahrtzeit & need to say kaddish. As soon as I get a minyan & we daven, you can leave.”
Not wanting to antagonize this individual, he unwillingly went back to say tehillim but still, only two more people arrived. Realizing that his morning was shot anyway, he remained until finally a minyan congregated. He thought the man would just say a mishna & then kaddish so he was surprised when he started from the beginning of davening. Wanting to leave he kept looking to the door hoping someone else would walk so he could go, but no one did. After the conclusion of the davening, the man brought out cake & schnapps. Only after that and with profuse thanks was he able to leave.
Finally he was making his way to the office when a man came running frantically screaming to get away. This man said that the communists came, overtook the city, killed out all the Jews & are now raiding the spoils. He turned, ran for his life & was able, after a few days, to escape Russia.
Imagine what would have happened had he left that minyan early.
On Chanuka, we say הפכת מספדי למחול לי פתחת שקי ותאזרני שמחה , you have changed my lament into dancing; you undid my sackcloth & girded me with gladness. The שפת אמת says that the days of Chanuka are days of great inspiration for the Jewish people. We were at a tremendous low when 'ה helped & we were taken out of slavery to freedom, out of bondage to redemption, teaching us that as great as the problems are, that's how great the redemption will be. Never give up & trust that 'ה knows what He's doing which will only be for our benefit.
Maybe this is the fault found in Yaakov’s question. While things looked so bleak & the pain was too much to bear, surely he knew that whatever 'ה did was for his benefit. Having those words come out of his mouth, however, insinuating that there was no plan, that things were just happening, was something that never should have been spoken. Teaching us that no matter what happens & what things look like, 'ה always has a plan!
Friday, December 7, 2012
Vayeshev
When the brothers sold Yosef, the Torah informs us what the Arabs were carrying in their caravan. וגמליהם נשאים נכאת וצרי ולט , and their camels were bearing spices, and balsam, and birthwort.
Rashi, in an effort to explain why the Torah felt the need to give us that information, explains that it was in order to teach us the reward that's due Tzadikim. Arabs normally carry foul smelling cargo while in this caravan, in the merit of Yosef, they were carrying spices.
The אוצרות התורה asks the obvious question. At a time like this when Yosef was just sold as a slave by his brothers , he's being torn away from his father to a uncertain fate not knowing if he'll ever return home, does he really cares about the smell?
The gemara in Berachos says that the fourth beracha in benching of הטוב והמטיב was established in Yavne commemorating the people that were killed in Beitar. דאמר רב מתנא אותו היום שניתנו הרוגי ביתר לקבורה תקנו ביבנה הטוב והמטיב. As רב מתנא said, on the day the murdered in Beitar were buried, they established the beracha of hatov v' hamaitiv: הטוב שלא הסריחו , the one who is good that they didn't rot והמטיב שניתנו לקבורה ,the one who does good that they were able to be buried.
I once heard a question about this from Rabbi Frand , who asked how can this be a cause for celebration? The Beis Hamikdash had been destroyed; the people were being prosecuted by the Romans; Beitar, a city destroyed fifty-two years after the destruction of Jerusalem, had been the last stronghold of the Jews, now was destroyed & tens of thousands of Jews murdered, which began the great exile of nearly two thousand years. Finally, they are allowed to go in & bury their dead. Is this a reason to thank 'ה for his benevolence? Should we be overjoyed to the point of adding a beracha to benching?
Answered Rabbi Frand, after the destruction of the Bais Hamikdash, the Jews felt that 'ה was done with them; He no longer wanted them as his people so they were depressed & forlorn. However, once they came to Beitar & saw that, by way of a miracle, the bodies hadn’t decayed & were fit for burial, they saw that all was not lost. 'ה still loved them which uplifted & rejuvenated their spirits. That's why they established the Beracha of הטוב והמטיב for they now realized that 'ה really never left them.
The sefer גדולת מרדכי says, it’s like the patient who is in a coma with the family waiting for the slightest movement. One twitch of the eye is cause for celebration, not because the patient is better but because there's hope.
So too by Yosef; it is true he was just sold by his brothers and didn’t know what was going to happen or if he would remain alive. Therefore, when he smelled the spices & realized that 'ה had made a miracle, even one so minor, it showed him that 'ה was still with him & that small glimmer of hope - recognition that he wasn't alone & would be protected - is what kept him going. We have to learn that no matter what's happening, we must find the little bit of good & know that 'ה will always be there for us!
Rashi, in an effort to explain why the Torah felt the need to give us that information, explains that it was in order to teach us the reward that's due Tzadikim. Arabs normally carry foul smelling cargo while in this caravan, in the merit of Yosef, they were carrying spices.
The אוצרות התורה asks the obvious question. At a time like this when Yosef was just sold as a slave by his brothers , he's being torn away from his father to a uncertain fate not knowing if he'll ever return home, does he really cares about the smell?
The gemara in Berachos says that the fourth beracha in benching of הטוב והמטיב was established in Yavne commemorating the people that were killed in Beitar. דאמר רב מתנא אותו היום שניתנו הרוגי ביתר לקבורה תקנו ביבנה הטוב והמטיב. As רב מתנא said, on the day the murdered in Beitar were buried, they established the beracha of hatov v' hamaitiv: הטוב שלא הסריחו , the one who is good that they didn't rot והמטיב שניתנו לקבורה ,the one who does good that they were able to be buried.
I once heard a question about this from Rabbi Frand , who asked how can this be a cause for celebration? The Beis Hamikdash had been destroyed; the people were being prosecuted by the Romans; Beitar, a city destroyed fifty-two years after the destruction of Jerusalem, had been the last stronghold of the Jews, now was destroyed & tens of thousands of Jews murdered, which began the great exile of nearly two thousand years. Finally, they are allowed to go in & bury their dead. Is this a reason to thank 'ה for his benevolence? Should we be overjoyed to the point of adding a beracha to benching?
Answered Rabbi Frand, after the destruction of the Bais Hamikdash, the Jews felt that 'ה was done with them; He no longer wanted them as his people so they were depressed & forlorn. However, once they came to Beitar & saw that, by way of a miracle, the bodies hadn’t decayed & were fit for burial, they saw that all was not lost. 'ה still loved them which uplifted & rejuvenated their spirits. That's why they established the Beracha of הטוב והמטיב for they now realized that 'ה really never left them.
The sefer גדולת מרדכי says, it’s like the patient who is in a coma with the family waiting for the slightest movement. One twitch of the eye is cause for celebration, not because the patient is better but because there's hope.
So too by Yosef; it is true he was just sold by his brothers and didn’t know what was going to happen or if he would remain alive. Therefore, when he smelled the spices & realized that 'ה had made a miracle, even one so minor, it showed him that 'ה was still with him & that small glimmer of hope - recognition that he wasn't alone & would be protected - is what kept him going. We have to learn that no matter what's happening, we must find the little bit of good & know that 'ה will always be there for us!
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