Vayishlach

When Yaakov realized that he must meet his brother Eisav, the posuk tells us ויקם בלילה ההוא ויקח את שתי נשיו ואת שתי שפחתיו ואת אחד עשר ילדיו he got up that night & took his two wives, & his two maids, and his eleven sons. Previously, we were told that he had twelve children so Rashi asks: what happened to Dina? Why was she left out of the count?

Rashi explains that she was put into a box to hide her, so that Eisav wouldn't see her & want to marry her. Yaakov was punished for that since, had Eisav married her, she would have had a positive effect on him turning his life around. Instead she was hidden in a box, Eisav missed the opportunity to change & as punishment to Yaakov, Dina was captured by Shechem.  

The sefer, Nachalas Yaakov, asks how is it that Leah is complimented for not wanting to marry Eisav. The posuk praises her, saying that her eyes were weak from crying because she thought she would end up with Eisav, inferring that what she did was noble & correct. However, Yaakov is criticized for withholding Dina. If Dina could have turned him around for the better, surely Leah could have.

Nachalas Yaakov answers that had Leah married Eisav at that time, she would not have been able to bring him around. He was habitual sinner, transgressing all the cardinal sins. However, now he had softened up a little. As the posuk tells us when he met Yaakov, he was overcome with emotion & kissed him wholeheartedly. At this time, however, there was a chance for him to come back & Dina could have been the one to accomplish that.  

Still, how could we fault Yaakov?
Where do we see that a momentary feeling could have a lasting effect?

One day, a woman knocks on Rabbi Zilberstein's door, telling him a fascinating story that happened at her kibbutz. A few days ago, a hailstorm in our area hit our kibbutz hard with damaging winds & hail. The houses on the kibbutz are built two together attached under one roof. As the hail was coming down, making frightening noises on the homes & damaging the roofs, people were astonished to see one house where the roof on one side was getting hammered by hail while the other side of the same roof was not touched at all!

It was astounding that every home around this one, including the one to which it was attached, was pummeled by hail while this one lone house wasn't touched. The people then realized that a widow lived in that house. Even though this was a secular kibbutz, one of the kibbutzniks remembered that there were pesukim in the Torah that forbade one from causing anguish to a widow. He said "if Hashem himself watches over the widow in such a wondrous manner, it’s a sign that the Torah must be true!"

The woman continued the story. She said that the people from the kibbutz went into the house where the widow herself was astonished at what happened. The widow then told them that just a few days prior she had had feelings of repentance & wanted to change her lifestyle. This showed her that her decision was the right one.

Perhaps we can equate this story to Yaakov. Just as this woman had feelings of repentance followed by a sign that pushed her over to make the move, so too, Eisav had momentary feelings of love for Yaakov. These were, in essence, feelings of repentance. Had he seen Dina at that time, she could have been what was needed to push him to make the complete change. Instead, she was hidden & the opportunity was lost, teaching us not to let an opportunity slip away. If we’re inspired, act on it; if we could be there for someone else, don't hide; accept the challenge & together we could make the world a better place!